The Day in Which Everything Went Wrong

Yesterday... not so much with the good.

It started out with me having to drive 20 miles to drop E off with a friend while I went to have my right boob sonogrammed. That's right. My boob is trying to kill me. A couple months ago, a week or two before we went to my parents', it started feeling like milk was letting down... but I quit nursing almost 10 months ago. So, I did what any normal human being would, and went to the doctor. He felt around, said he didn't feel anything, but I should see someone in the women's clinic just in case. The doctor in the women's clinic did the same and said, "I don't see anything, but you should get it sonogrammed just in case." So, I haven't worried about it. Then, about halfway through the sonogram, I got the train stopping question: "is there a history of breast cancer in your family?"

Which was followed by "we can't really see a whole lot, other than your milk ducts are dilated, so we want you to get a breast MRI. Because that's the best way to see cancer,"

I calmly got dressed, walked out to my car, and then cried hysterically for about 30 minutes... I then may or may not have crashed my husband's work... thing... so I could cry all over him.

I'm really trying not to worry. The discomfort seems to only show up during "that time of month" (obviously, that has never been a problem before), and it comes and goes on both sides. Doesn't sound like cancer to anyone else, right? (right?!)

I then got home and found a rejection letter from the agent I felt was probably the best fit for me.

Thanks for rubbing the salt in that wound, agent who will remain unnamed.

Oh, but it gets better. (Albeit anti-climactic.... sorry).

I then put E down for her nap, S gets home, and I go to do something on my laptop (probably write about the above) and it goes dark.... And then, when rebooting was attempted, the blue screen of death. Lots and lots of blue screen of death.

I am not impressed.

I am also writing now from a new [cheap] laptop from Costco. As much as I like new stuff, getting a new computer is nothing but a pain in the ass. If it were up to me, they would all be awesome for 10 or more years, because having to move and reload all your shit is just... head/desk.

Ok. I am done whining.

Recollecting a Goiter

Me (while looking at www.weather.com): Ugh, it's going to be warm tomorrow.

S:Whosawhatsits?

Me: It's going to be warm. 73.

S: (Makes a weird what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-you face)

Me: What? I like fall. I like the sixties.

S: It is good sweatshirt weather...

Me: See? I can be a bum all of the time and no one can blame me.

Except, perhaps, for Overly Sensitive Military Wives (OSMW). They hate sweatshirts and jeans. But, you know what, they can kiss my Ga Tech sweatshirt wearing behind.

Anyway... Know what else fall means? Warm clothes for the kiddo! Except, erm... I put her in her jeans (which fit perfectly right now... well, with the elastic inside band pulled as tight as possible) and one of my favorite long-sleeved shirts... And her belly button was hanging out.

Tragedy, guys. A massive tragedy.

It's such a cute shirt, too. It's from Gap, long sleeved, with a pink sparkly poodle on the front and a little tulle tutu edge at the hem. Adorable. And now, relegated to the pack-me-away pile. After doing some quick reconnaissance of the 3T clothes--

(Me: How do you spell reconnaissance? S: r-e-c... (etc). You know, you could use reconnoiter. That's a weird one. Me: What does that mean? Is it a goiter that you recall in your mind? S:I'm going to just... watch... football...now...)

--And 3T clothes? Not so many. We have one pair of jeans, but the jeans are still a little long (her torso always grows faster than her legs) a couple dresses and about 4 shirts. No sweaters. Since S had staff duty last night (aka 24 hours of mandatory babysitting) and came home to sleep this morning, I took the munchkin out to the mall to see if we could find her some clothes for the increasingly chilly weather (the highs have been in the mid sixties... W00t). We hit the jackpot at Baby Gap, and came home with this treasure trove of goodies:

 

(Pretend you see another long-sleeved shirt like the cat one, only with a dog on it... No picture on gap.com *sad face*)

 

 

I'm not entirely sure how we ended up leaving with only black and white clothing, but at least I won't have to worry about matching... I  got a great deal, though. Everything was on clearance and was eligible for an additional 25% off, and then I get a 10% off military discount (Tacoma Mall Gap FTW! The one at my parents' mall won't give a military discount on top of a discount... suckage). The most expensive thing I bought her was the dress, and it came out to $11.47. Everything else was around $5 a piece. I couldn't have spent that on used clothes at a consignment sale, ya'll.

 

And yet, I feel guilty. I love shopping for my kiddo, and obviously she needed the clothes, but it would have been so much better for our adoption fund if she just held off on the growth spurt a little bit. Seriously, child isn't even 2 yet, and she still measures in the 97th percentile (in height) for 2-year-olds (she's in the 50th for weight).  I'm glad I was able to get a good deal, and I seriously wish I didn't feel like I had to watch my pennies...

 

I didn't buy anything for myself, though. So, I guess this means I have to wear jeans and sweatshirts all fall... Darn...

 



Elevenses and High Tea

Last night, shortly before launching the snowflake puzzle pieces, I went to a talk hosted by Kennesaw State University's Fitness for Living program. Dr. Dan Bernadot of Georgia State University (and a whole host of other organizations, to include several US Olympic teams) was the guest speaker and discussed daily energy balance and its role in obesity and weight management (and building lean muscle mass).

It was very informative, and I definitely encourage you to look him and his research up. He was the first person to explain that "eat six small meals a day" idea people are always throwing out with some real scientific evidence... And since I'm usually all about the science, I have been converted. Essentially, what I took away from his talk is that, throughout the day, your body should never have more than 400 calories of excess energy and should never dip below -400 calories. Too much: it's stored as fat. Too little: your body stores what you have given it as fat. Tough balance to keep... Well, good news is: there's an app for that. (No, really. There is.)

I am definitely one of those individuals who falls into that 2-3 meals a day category. I try not to snack because I don't want to end up eating too much, and I do like my biggest meal of the day to be at dinner. Dr. Bernadot argues that the body will automatically regulate itself to only eat the same calories it needs to function. Sounds like a plan.

The hard part is going to be eating smaller meals and adding in some snacks. I have decided the best way to do this is:

Elevenses and High Tea.

That's right. Who doesn't need an excuse to eat a scone and some tea in the morning? And then some cucumber sandwiches and a teacake in the afternoon?

Um... No one. That's who.

So, once I make it home it's tome for some changes. What I have been doing was working for awhile(despite the hypothyroidism/Hashimoto's), but now that it isn't, let's try something new!

(Ok... Fine. I'll probably have some fruit and some homemade bread, not a bunch of cakes and cookies... but one can dream, right?)

Also... don't forget about snowflakes and puzzle pieces!

FOOTBALL!!!!

In honor of the college football season kicking off, we wore lots of Ga Tech gear yesterday. E painted the town (and Costco) while wearing her GT chearleader outfit (I really wish the world could have little girl team spirit wear that wasn't a chearleader outfit, but until I find something else, it will have to do), and it was wonderful. Unfortunately, Tech won't play (and lose) their football game until Monday night, so we are cheering for our other favorite teams in the meantime.

Football is very complicated for us, here. You see, we have to root for all of the family alma maters. We have Ga Tech for us quartermaster people. And then Alabama for my dad and paternal grandfather, Florida State for my mom. Purdue for my maternal grandfather, Cornell for my maternal grandmother... And then there are all the teams we hate with a passion. Georgia--the Cesspool of the South. Auburn. University of Florida. Miami.

Here... I have a highly technical visual for you:

The hierarchy of football... brought to you by Windows Paint

To celebrate football season, I did some shopping. Meet my new fall footwear:

Pair one

Pair two

I know, I know... They are only second-tier football-greatness shoes, but come on... Bear Bryant, guys. And Ga Tech (and FSU) are really just lagging behind when it comes to producing everyday fashion. I can't really wear gold shoes and expect them to make a statement unless paired with a logo indicating who I am rooting for. Oh, well. Maybe Paul Johnson will start wearing plaid, become one of the best football coaches of all time, and we can all wear the Murray colors (or the Baird colors. But none of the other ones. Duh). Until that happens, I will be sportin' the Bear houndstooth.

I just had to share. Because they make me so happy.

So... Go Jackets, Go 'Noles, and Roll Tide!

...Oh, and here's something for you non-football people (the bumper sticker on the next car over at the mall):



Why Don't We Ever Go To Sizzler?

We had a great time over at some friends' house for dinner tonight. S's best friend M mentioned that he is an avid reader of my blog (not that you would know this by my comment section!). However, he finds that I am too depressing, and that all my talk of adoption is boring. Sorry, M.

So, I thought the only logical course of action would be to write a blog just for M. Well... with keeping M in mind. (I suggested his own wife write a guest blog, since she, too, is a QM wife, but she said the world isn't ready for that, yet).

Anyway, S brought up that we bat around the phrase "Why don't we ever go to Sizzler?" You have to say this in kind of a dopey, nasally voice (think Milton in Office Space), but it is exactly what S asks me every time we pass by Sizzler and exactly how he says it. We don't go to Sizzler because I am a snob. I have very specific ideas about what is good, socially acceptable food, and Sizzler is not it. Ruth's Chris? Yes. Mellow Mushroom? Yes. Waffle House? Yes. Sizzler? No.

Also... we don't actually go out to eat very often. For one thing, there aren't that many great restaurants around Fort Lewis. And those that are good/look good are expensive. I can go home to Ga and get vegetable fajitas for $8.99. In Wa, vegetable fajitas at the Mexican restaurant around the corner are $14.99. I don't understand... Also, as an officer, he is expected to go to so many unit social events, it's just nice to have time at home together.

Wow. I digress. Well, so my husband really wants to go to Sizzler. Lucky for him, we get coupons in the mail for their establishment at least once a week, and I do believe they make gift cards. I have really been struggling with what to get him for the holidays this years, and I do believe I have found the perfect solution: A trip to Sizzler.

Honestly, I am pretty nervous about going, but I do love the man, and sometimes you have to make sacrifices for those you love. I just imagine that the moment I step into Sizzler, Volcano Rainier will explode, and I will not only die, but I will die in a Sizzler. Can you imagine a burial site any more depressing?

Old Country Buffet? Well... yes. You got me there with that one.

So, wish me luck. And send me suggestions for new ways to show my husband how much I care for him once I have succumbed to the ultimate act of love.




*BTW, my husband has never asked why we never go to Sizzler in a serious manner, and he also doesn't sound like Milton. Leonard from The Big Bang Theory, maybe...

You're Eating Your Cake Wrong

I have visual instructions on how to go about this the right way, just for you:

(For best results, use a frozen Costco All-American Chocolate Cake)

 

Wittlebee Box

After much drama, we finally received our first Wittlebee box in the mail this afternoon.

S thinks it's great. I'm a little more on the fence. We ended up with a purple t-shirt (top left), a nightgown with butterflies on it (top right), polka-dot dress (bottom right), flowered dress (middle), and then a pants/capri outfit (left).

I ended up getting the above for $20 with some rewards (click on either of my links to get a $10 reward for yourself!). So, that came out to just a little over $3 per item. That's about what I would expect to pay per outfit at a consignment sale--so pretty good. However, I'm not entirely sure these outfits are what I would have picked out at a consignment sale. I I really like the flower dress and the pants outfit, but I'm not sure that I would have brought home any of the rest... Nightgown maybe. T-shirt probably not.

But, either way you look at it: $3 dress: good. We'll see what we think once E tries some of them on!



Post #90

Obviously, I have no good titles up my sleeve. Sorry.

I ordered my first Wittlebee box last night! If you have no idea what that is, it's kind of like Birchbox, but for babies/toddlers. Once a month, for $40, they will send you over $100 worth of designer clothing for your little holy terror/sweet adorable munchkin. You will be asked to fill out a style sheet, which helps them coordinate a box that will fit your needs (long sleeves, short sleeves, polka dots, lady bugs... you name it), and then you get a fun little surprise in the mail. I'm excited to see what we get this first month. Now, if you're anything like me, you're probably thing OMAGERHD, $40!?! Yeah... Well, if you use my link, you can get $10 (and I will, too, for subsequent orders!), and if you sign up, they will send you additional coupons. I was able to place my first order for just $19.99. If it's good stuff, I couldn't do much better at Gymboree or Gap (my usual baby store haunts).

I'll let all 4 of you who might care how it goes.

In other news:

• I have a water baby! S got home early, so we took E to the splash park on post. It's kind of like Centennial Olympic Park in Atlanta (for all of you who know what that's like), so there is no standing water, so it gives her some independence in playing in water. We have tried to visit a few times this summer, but today was the first time it was actually warm enough to allow her to let loose. She loved it and we had to drag her away kicking and screaming (literally. kicking and screaming).
• We are learning Russian as a family. E: not interested. S and I are chugging right along, although neither of us are great yet (but, keep in mind, we just started re-learning yesterday). I am really hoping we can get E into it... It would be wonderful if she got even a little bit of another language (or two or three), just so it makes it easier to learn later in life. Besides, aerospace engineers need to know Russian--she's getting a head start. I am wanting to have somewhat of a grasp of the language for when we adopt sometime in the future.
• I need to remember to add the $0.97 S put in the adoption fund jug this evening.
• I have 96,000 words, but I didn't write tonight. I needed a break. I know what's going to happen next, I just have become too consumed by the Olympics to really get anything good down, so I just decided to take a night of rest.
• It's going to be hot here in the Northworst this weekend: we're talking 90 degrees. That's hot in Atlanta where they have air conditioning. I'm going to just go ahead and let you know: if you haven't heard from me in the next couple days, it's probably because I have melted.

Olympic Thoughts

In the event that anyone cares what has been running through my head this Olympics, I have a treat for you:

• Every time I see a pool, I smell chlorine.
• How did I ever swim competitively??? It just so isn't me!
• Russian [female] gymnasts have much more attractive bodies than American gymnasts. They are prettier to watch, too.
• I wonder if they serve popcorn at the Olympics?
• I am pretty sure they use Morgan Freeman to narrate commercials because they all. make. me. cry!
• Women's basketball fashion could really learn something from women's volleyball fashion.
• My husband is going to have to start swimming competitively... I always forget how attractive that "look" is. A speedo and a uniform? Um... yes.
• I'm going to be watching a lot of NBC this fall/winter/spring.
• I feel really old.
• I really wish I had learned how to fence. And arch (arch? Is that what you call competing in archery? Clearly I need to learn the terminology because I take up this sport). And I wish I had gotten into rowing... They had a club at Georgia Tech, and did I get involved? No. I suck.
• Nathan Adrian is not only from this part of Washington, but his mom threatened him with the same things mine did if I quit swimming. It must be a common mom thing.
• What is with the weird see-through piece on the women's bathing suits in swimming?
• My husband should have been British and joined their Army... Because then, after 20 years, he could apply to be a Beefeater! (mmm... Beefeater).
• I'm pudgy. Well, I knew that already, but damn the Olympics for reminding me of this fact (in related news, I have been prescribed an increase in thyroid meds... Go thyroid meds, go!).
• I always cheer for the home team if "our guys" aren't competing (or if they are, I want the home team to get second, hehe).
• I'm retiring to the UK. Or at least getting a vacation home there. End of story.

Red, White, and Blue

If you are watching the Olympics at all, one thing that will becoming abundantly clear: citizens of the US do not hold the monopoly on red, white, and blue.

It definitely makes me feel better about my "red, white, and blue" kitchen... Totally not on purpose, I just really like blue, and red makes a pretty fantastic contrast color. Couple that with the fact that I am totally disinterested in painting my kitchen (it came white, and white it shall stay), and I have a patriotic kitchen...

...Only problem is, I find that a little problematic. I'm not against other people going all U-S-A on their food preparation area, I just feel it's a little overdone, especially around the military community. Everyone seems to have one room that is dedicated to Americana, and the kitchen is no stranger to this phenomenon. It's something I have desperately trying to resist for several years now, and it's been a losing battle.

Thankfully, the Olympics came along and saved me. No longer do I have to consider my cook space a shrine to the stars and stripes, I can choose any one of the many other countries who wave red, white, and blue colors: South Korea, France, Russia, United Kingdom... Personally, I'm a little partial to the Union Jack, but I'm open to others, as well.

Done

A Little Known Fact About Moi

So, I have this really annoying habit. I tend to withhold information when I think the people that matter will look down on me because of that information... For example, I struggled with how to tell my parents I was pregnant for a couple weeks, simply because I was terrified they were going to mad, disappointed, condescending... I'm not entirely sure why I thought that, especially since I was twenty-four at the time, had a full-time job, was married, had a degree, was working on a MA, and was able to pay all of my bills. I suppose it's because in a lot of ways, I still feel like I am about 17 years old and need their permission and acceptance to exist. Even though that is not remotely true.

I welcome and value their opinions. I want them to be proud, support me and my decisions, love me and my family, and even though they have never withheld any of the above, something inside me thinks they might if I do something "reckless" enough (Does anyone else find it ironic that my idea of "reckless" is procreating? Obviously, I have issues).

Same thing with my husband. I have been wrestling with myself for two days, wanting to talk to him about something, but every time I open my mouth, I can't seem to do it. I am afraid that he will turn me down, think me unreasonable, crush my heart, stomp on my dreams... And for absolutely no good reason. He has never done that before, so I am not entirely sure why I think he's going to start all of a sudden.

Obviously, I have some sort of unresolved issues with something from my deep, dark past (pfftt, hahaha... yeah...right), but don't ask me what the heck those might be, because I have no idea. And if I want to get past this next hurdle, I'm going to have to talk to him about it... And after I get over that initial shock, I can move on to the paranoia that my parents will want to disown me. Which is really sad, because I am the heir to their vast estate (If you can find the one non-truth in the series of truth in that paragraph, hats off to you).

Why do I feel like a 14-year-old trying to talk to her parents about getting birth control? Seriously?

Ugh, anyway, while I eat myself up inside, you can be captivated by the most beautiful (and slightly damaged) smile in the world:

A Random Post

I have a lot of little things I could write about, but nothing terribly substantial. So here are some short thoughts:

• My cook-out for the platoon went well. We have a lot of left over potato salad, but not much of anything else. I even left some food for some of the guys who live in the barracks, can't barbecue themselves, etc. It turned out pretty freakin' fantastic if I do say so myself, and I might write a post in a few days about how to smoke using your regular charcoal grill. Because my dad taught me and he will never in a million years write a blog post.
• It sounds like a war zone out there. Here in WA, there are very few laws about fire works (it's so wet, fires aren't much of a concern), so everyone shoots them off. We were invited to go to our friends', but since we weren't sure about S's schedule, we declined (sort of wish we went, anyway!). Instead, we watched 360 degrees of fireworks from our back porch. E was unimpressed.
• When I wasn't cooking, I celebrated the 4th by watching House Hunters on HGTV.
• I never really ate a meal today. I sampled the cooking to make sure it tasted okay, had a piece of pizza, and too much cookie cake. Why do soldiers hate cookie cake??? Bastards.
• S got a letter from the powers that be telling him he has been pre-qualified to apply for Special Forces, Psychological Operations, or Civil Affairs (this essentially means that if he were to apply, they wouldn't immediately laugh his application off the table... I think). We're trying to get more information, but he decides to apply to anything, it will probably be Civil Affairs. If he were to get it, we would have to move to CA for at least a year. That sounds like balls.
• I really wanted a cocktail while I watched free fireworks from the freezing cold comfort of my backyard, but the Class Six (military liquor store) didn't have any of the ingredients I needed. They failed to provide the one service they exist to provide. Fail.
• My child loves sitting on the dog bed. Eww.
• Apparently, toddlers don't sleep through fireworks.
• Dogs don't like fireworks, either.
• Speaking of dogs, one of the dogs escaped the fence this afternoon. I was close to freaking out. Thankfully, he made a reappearance. Life was suddenly okay, again. Until he ate some of the leftover pulled pork. Asshole.
• The terrible twos kill the baby blues.
• Oh yeah... Happy 4th of July!

Thinking Hurts

I've been away from my regularly scheduled program, which is why I haven't posted anything in... Forever. I am sure I am due a few things about which someone might actually care, but instead you are stuck with this, because, well... This is what I want to write about.

A few weeks ago, one of my friends from back home (we were in school together all through K12 and were pretty close in middle school) left me a comment and recommended that I read something on one of her other friends' blog. I cannot for the life of me remember what it is I wrote that spurred out that particular transaction, and really, in the grand scheme of things, it probably isn't important.

Anyway, my friend sent me to My Camo Kids, which is written by a fellow Army officer wife, Lora. I get the impression she is from my hometown, and if I had to fake a guess, I would say she was probably my friend's older sister's friend in real life, but I have no idea, and I am shy enough that I will probably never ask (why am I saying all of this? I swear, I have the worst time getting to the point). I'm really good at imagining things in my head, sometimes, and this very well might be one of those times, but I'm just going to go with it. Anyway, I read whatever it is my friend wanted me to read, had a quick ponder over it, and then headed to the "about" section of her blog, simply because I am overly curious. There I learned that we not only shared an Army bond (Hooah...ish?), but that she and her husband grew their family through an international adoption.

Okay, I can almost see your eyebrows lifting in question (in that wtf-is-this-nutshell-talking-about), but if you bare with me for a few minutes, I'll elaborate as best I can. Several years ago--I was still a student at Georgia Tech, so it was at least 4 years ago, but more likely to be like...6-7 years ago--I somehow became interested in International Adoption in general, but adoptiong from Ukraine in particular. I did some research, had rambling conversations with my husband,  and eventually decided that was something I wanted to pursue in the future. I was going to set it on the back burner, because, well, I was A) too young at the time and B) was not wanting children any time soon, anyway.

Over the years, the image I had painted of the process slowly began to be eaten away. Several of the courses I took in both my undergraduate and graduate degree programs began to make me waiver in my desire to adopt from Ukraine (not to mention that the country closed down adoptions there for a period of time sometime in there somewhere...). It all because a little complicated and confusing for me, and I ended up moving the idea from the back burner to the freezer.

Fast forward a few years; I got bit by the baby bug, I got pregnant, E was born, and adoption was the last thing on my mind. And then, one day, I was driving on post and there was an MWR (Morale, Welfare, and Recreation) sign that was begging for JBLM families to foster. It got me thinking about adoption, again, but this time from the domestic side. My academic conscience couldn't find a while lot wrong with adopting domestically (though the legality that comes with foster-adopting is scary stuff). A few days later, in the Army Officers' Wives Facebook group, someone brought up adoption and it became a rather popular discussion. A lot of women on there discussed their reasons for going the international route for their adoptions: it's tough to do a domestic adoption in the US. It's nearly impossible for military families who constantly move (this is just the opinion of a handful of people, but it made enough sense to me). They expressed their preference for international adoption, simply because it is easier, and my academic self  was tackled by my common sense self; I was reminded of what I had probably known all along: having a family might just be the most important thing to a child without one, regardless of where that child is born.


So, the thought reentered my mind, and it once again became a possibility for the future. And then I found Lora's blog. Today, I went and read through some of her posts that were tagged "adoption," and I got a better feel for what her early-on experiences were (I haven't made my way through all of the posts)... And for someone who really has a hard time believing in things like signs and "meant-to-be's," it sure felt like a kick in the pants.

Buy a Prius, Drive Like a Granny

When S commissioned in 2010, I was driving the 2005 Corolla S my parents bought me in college (I lived on campus my first year, and was not a fan. I think I came home every weekend but one my first semester, and after Spring Break of my second, I essentially moved home entirely. My parents told me that if they didn't have to pay for room and board, they would get me a car, pay for my gas and the insurance for my remaining 3 years--S and I picked up the tab after I graduated and landed my position at the university) and he was driving my dad's 1989 Ford Ranger pick-up... It was sexy. Before he deployed to Iraq, we made the brilliantly uneducated--and stupid--decision to buy a 1967 Ford Falcon... It was great the first 10 minutes he owned it, but was just a pain in the rear end the remaining 5 years. We ended up donating it--I think?--and cutting our losses. We shared the Corolla for awhile, but my parents were gracious enough to offer up the truck for us to use until we got something new.

Enter the Prius.

We did some homework and decided the hybrid was the way we wanted to go. We keep our cars long enough that getting a hybrid was a money-saver, and S was excited about "voting with his money." So, after his commissioning, we scrounged up a hefty down payment, went to the dealership, got suckered into opting for way more gadgets than we had originally planned for, and left with a car.

Because it's our "family" car, I drive it the most. When we had E in the infant car seat, I drove the Corolla a lot because we could easily move the seat from one base to the other. Unfortunately, spending $300 on a second convertible car seat just didn't fit into the budget, so now I drive the Prius almost exclusively, and when we go somewhere as a family, that's the car we take.

Anyway, back to my point.

While those of you in the rest of the country are experiencing gas price lows, those of us on the Pacific coast are having extreme highs. We buy our gas at Costco and it was $4.15/gallon yesterday.... And that's at least $.10 cheaper than everywhere else, including on-post. Because of this, I have been much more mindful of the mpg gauge on the Prius, and thus, my driving style has drastically changed.

Before I started watching the gauge, I was getting about 44 mpg on average. Right now, it's sitting at 54 mpg, all because I started driving differently.... Yes, I now drive like a granny. The 35 mph zone is my new best friend--I've been avoiding the interstate and taking back roads because I get such better gas milage. I can get up to speed without breaking the "eco" line, and coast in a range that gets me anywhere from 75-100 mpg. This probably makes me unpopular with other drivers, because I tend to go the speed limit, if not under it... Not that I didn't become infinitely slower when I started carting around a kiddo.

This may actually be the first car I have driven that encourages me to drive at a pace that can only be described as the opposite of reckless (lol). The Corolla is like driving a go cart, so it's easy to get out of hand (my one and only speeding ticket can attest to that). My goal is to make it to a tank that averages 65 mpg... Cause how awesome would that be?

[End incredibly boring post]

In other news:

• I think E has hit the Terrible Twos. If she isn't blatantly disobeying me, she is throwing a temper tantrum (or so it seems). She's really not that bad, but it's such a drastic change in such a short amount of time (like... a week???) that it's notable.
• Her new favorite thing to do while riding in the car is lick the bottom of her feet... Um. Eww?
• She has probably eaten her weight in berries the last couple weeks--I'm not complaining. I would much prefer her be on a fruit kick than a processed food kick.
• I have lost a few pounds since my omg-my-body-hates-me post a few weeks back. Bad news? Now I can't get any more to fall off. Argh!
• I met with a new endocrinologist--the jury is still out.
• I made cookie cake and it was a rousing success.
• I still hate Washington.

And, while you're barbecuing this weekend--please remember to remember those who served and sacrificed it all.

Beauty Regimen

A few of my friends started getting Birchbox in the mail a few months ago, and posted about how fabulous it was. Needless to say, I bought into the hype, and subscribed myself. I really liked it, and wanted to post about my experiences with the products they sent, but think I probably need to establish a base of comparison before doing that.

So, even though I know nobody cares, here is my beauty regimen:

Hair:
I'm a fan of rotating through my shampoo and conditioner. I have three that I am currently using, and I like all three, but for different reasons.

• Aquage
  I can only get this through my hair dresser (stylist? I have no idea what the politically correct term is--Sorry, Tina, is you are reading this!), and always make sure I have plenty of it on hand. Unfortunately for me, I tend to grossly under-estimate how long my remaining product will last, so I tend to have about twice as much as I need at any given time. But, I suppose that's a good thing when I can't make the trip back to GA for awhile. Anyway, it's my "main" hair product, and I use it every other day. It smells divine and just really makes my hair feel... natural. It isn't heavy or overly producty... It also lathers up really nicely. Who doesn't like shampoo lather?? The conditioner isn't too heavy, either, and while I can tell a difference after I use it on my hair, it doesn't leave it feeling overly oily.

• Giovanni
  This is my "off-day" shampoo and conditioner. I use the Tea Tree Oil version on the days when my hair is feeling extra oily. I typically wash my hair once a day, but every once in awhile I will let it go an extra day, and then I feel like I need to use something that will wick the oil away. Mostly, I ended up going that route because Costco carried a GIGANTIC package of shampoo and conditioner for half the price of my "old" alternative, and I like it well enough (I have about half a gallon of the stuff left, so that's a good thing). I actually prefer their 50:50 line, better. It has a light, orangey smell and I use it when I want to have really shiny, highly "pretty" hair. Usually for days when I know I will be out of the house doing something other than the normal trip to the commissary. The best part about this line is it's eco-friendly and not terribly expensive.
• Biosilk
  This is my leave-in conditioner. I put it in before I blow my hair dry, usually just around the ends of my hair. I tend to get a lot of split ends, and I feel like this helps. It also keeps my hair from going ultra-frizzy after I blow it dry. The downside is it's expensive. I used to be able to buy it at Costco for a fairly reasonable price, but they haven't had it in a long time. I only have a little bit left, so I am in the market for a viable alternative.  

Face:

• Simple Smoothing Facial Scrub and Refreshing Facial Wash
  I just started using Simple's products a few weeks ago. I have been bouncing around trying to find a cleanser I really like for awhile. I like Avon's Anew cleanser, but I got it through my mom at cost, and she quit getting Avon... And so, so did I. Before that, I used an acne-preventing regimen, but then my skin finally decided it no longer wanted to be a temperamental teenager, and I got to using big-girl cleanser. Anyway, back to Simple. I like that is is really fresh feeling and smelling, although the scent isn't my absolute favorite.I love, however, that it has no artificial dyes or perfumes, and that it is hypoallergenic. I will probably continue to use it, as I can get a really good deal at the commissary.

• Bio-Oil
  I know, it's weird, but I use Bio-Oil as my moisturizer. I tend to do my face washing in the shower, and then apply the Bio-Oil right after I have dried my face. I let it sit for a few minutes until I can no longer "feel" it before I put on my make-up. I started using it to combat the lines and wrinkles that were making their virgin appearances around my eyes and forehead. They obviously aren't anything horrible, but I could see them. Anyway, after about three or four weeks of the Bio-Oil, I started noticing a reduction in the above. It is very reasonable, especially because I need so little of it. Just a couple dabs does my entire face. Love it.
• Make-Up
  I use a variety of make-up, but all of it is mineral make-up. When I switched to mineral make-up, I started to notice that my skin started to clear up and be less oily. I started with Bare Minerals, and then branched out from there. I still have some of their eyeshadow that I use, but haven't bought anything new in years. One of my favorite brands is Aromaleigh. Unfortunately, the owner closed down the business last year, so I was unable to get it for a long time and had to find new minerals, elsewhere. Happily, they are back up and running, I just haven't ordered from them, again. I do, however, use their eyeshadow everyday and still love it. They have tons of colors, more than any other company (or at least they used to). I just started using E.L.F. cosmetics around Christmas when I began to run out of other products. So far, I like everything I have used except their finishing powder, but only because their lightest color was too dark for me. My favorite E.L.F. product, however, has to be their mineral eyeshadow primer. One of the problems I have with the mineral make-up is, by the end of the day, the powder has rubbed off or pooled in the creases of my eyes. But with that stuff, it stays exactly where it is supposed to be (and the colors don't get diluted by the chemicals in my skin. Double win!)
  

Body

I hate to admit it, but I use the Victoria's Secret Fantasy products, and the Love Spell scent more specifically. I keep trying to find a new, more grown-up scent, but I always end up coming back to Love Spell. It smells divine, and it was the scent S picked out for me for our first Christmas together. I really do like it, but I feel a little silly buying it, sometimes. I usually try to switch out my scents every once in awhile, so I have been using the Sheer Love scent recently. It's a little on the floral side for me, though (I like floral, but I like it mixed with a fruity scent, as well), so I probably won't keep it around after I finish it up. I'm always looking for an alternative, though. Feel free to make suggestions.

I typically apply the lotion the second I turn off the shower spray, before I towel off. After it's good and worked in, I towel off. This keeps my skin super soft and moisturized, much more so than when I apply the lotion after drying. I use the spray and perfume, too, but I think their application is pretty self-explanatory/well-known.

Hands

I am pretty skeptical of mall-kiosk products, but S gave me a manicure set from Dead Sea Premiere for my birthday. It comes with a nail block, cuticle oil, and a hand lotion. It's fantastic. It makes my nails look beautiful and my hands feel lovely. I totally recommend it. I also have a salt scrub (which I prefer to sugar scrubs) and a body butter. Ah-mahz-ing. I use the whole set about once a month, and it really lasts that long, if not more.

Why My Family > Yours

I like to mock my husband by "talking" like him, sometimes. Usually, this means I speak in an oddly baritone squeaky voice that sounds nothing like him, but that's why it's funny.

Anyway, so I was going through the coupons that came in the mail this afternoon. Most of them were for fast food restaurants and... more fast food restaurants. But there were a few good ones in there--you know, $1.50 off M&Ms and $2.00 off toothpaste. I came across one for Sizzler and asked him--in  my worst impression of his voice--"Why don't we ever go to Sizzler?"

First, he stopped chasing after E long enough to blink at me in confusion. "Why are you talking like that?" he asked me.

"I'm doing my impression of you." Said in same annoying voice.

"Whatever. Aren't you a snob?"

"Yes, but why don't we ever go to Sizzler?"

"Because you're a snob. It's like the Wal-Mart of food."

Touche.

He then proceeds to sit down and focus on Family Guy. Twenty seconds later, E brings me her potty and asks me to open it. Unfortunately, I had already sat down to type out the Sizzler exchange, so I passed it over to my husband and told her, "Daddy is going to help you go potty."

However, as I made eye contact with my husband, it was to see that he was lounging in my chair, pieces of cardboard wrapped around his wrists. I raised one eyebrow and passed him the potty.

He smirked and said, "I'm busy being a super hero."

I waited a second before replying with: "Don't think that's not going in my blog."

"They're gauntlets. Who wouldn't want gauntlets?"

I chose not to encourage him and remained silent while I typed out exactly what was said. He did help E sit on the potty, which I very much appreciate. But she was back up in seconds, dancing to the Family Guy theme song.

Yes. This is just a glimpse into five minutes of my life.


You're welcome.